Everyone has their own set of deal breakers. I know that I have my own list made up as well. Although everyone has different relationship standards, there are a few that I believe should be made constant. Here is my list of 10 situations that should cause anyone to cut ties and run:
1. Lying/Dishonesty – This includes anything from lying about owning a dog to having a three-way orgy with two of your best friends. While the latter may be forgivable, any form of lying should be a big red flag. Those who are comfortable with little fibs often find themselves trapped in ostentatious stories of grandeur. Have enough respect for yourself to end it.
2. Physical and Emotional Abuse – Get out right away! There is no good reason to stay with someone that has no respect for your body or your mind. If you realize that you’re being abused, stop it before it gets any worse. Unfortunately, those who find themselves in these situations often counter act it with denial. They remain in this toxic environment until someone else notices.
3. Unhealthy Possessive Behaviors – You were casually texting your brother to coordinate plans for your mom’s birthday when that special someone in your life swoops in and grabs your phone. Suddenly, you feel as if this nice dinner date has turned into an interrogation. He’s looking through all your messages and asking questions like “who’s Brad” or “did you two ever date.” Of course this incident doesn’t happen just once. No, it happens every time you check your phone. Now you feel as if you can’t even look at it without a death stare and an explanation of the motives behind your mobile device use. A little jealousy is completely healthy in any relationship. Of course you don’t want your significant other to think its ok to flirt with other people. That’s absolutely normal. However, this is an entirely new level of jealousy. Don’t let yourself be controlled by someone else. If you two can’t trust each other, it’s never going to work out.
4. Consistent Fighting – This isn’t even fun! You don’t want to be fighting, and I’m sure he doesn’t want to be fighting. So, why not put yourselves out of this misery! You’re more likely to find healthy relationships with other people than you are with each other. Sure, a little dispute here and there is always going to happen. But if this is a non-stop routine the two of you have, it’s probably time to call it quits.
5. Not Supportive – Having someone you can lean on in your time of need is one of the main purpose of being in a relationship. Why would you want to be with someone that can’t give you the emotional support you deserve?
6. Different Values – One of the first qualities I asses about a person on date is values. I believe that I am ambitious, optimistic, and considerate, and these are all qualities that I would want in a mate as well. I could never date someone who always complained and thought a hard day of work consisted of mowing the grass. It would make me miserable.
7. Disrespectful – This should be a no-brainer. Respect is one of the foundational elements of love. If your partner is already failing at the basics, why should you ever expect anything more. If he or she is showing disrespect to your family, your friends, or you on a regular basis, there’s definitely a problem that needs addressing.
8. Different Long-Term Goals – Ever since I can remember, I’ve wanted to be a mom some day. I’ve always dreamed of having that cookie cutter lifestyle, and it’s very important for me to pursue this avenue. I could never be with someone who didn’t support my goals and wish to fulfill them with me.
9. No Chemistry – You shouldn’t be in a relationship if there isn’t any chemistry in the first place. However, shortly into a relationship, you may find that you aren’t really attracted to your partner like you thought. The clutter and excitement of a new relationship may have clouded your vision. Get out of immediately. The worst thing you can do in this situation is wait.
10. Unhappy – Why should you waste your time if you’re unhappy? There are plenty of fish in the sea. Why not take a chance on love elsewhere? Although, I would highly recommend attempting to work things out with your partner before you split. There’s always a chance that external factors are truly to blame.
This image has been modified by How to Survive Modern Dating.